End of Another Year
I have been thinking about writing here for quite awhile. But I just have not been able to find do it. I have a couple of entries I wanted to write before the end of the year. However, with 2006 fast approaching and the fact I am heading out to some friends in a couple of hours tends to negate the possibility of doing that. So I will just write this one.
Since it is the end of the year, I feel an urge to assess the past year and look ahead to 2006. I'm not sure I want to assess 2005 in public here (yea, I know. This is not too public, but still more so than I want). I tend to not let people peek to far behind the facade I put up. Over the past few years, I have let some close friends around back and have given them a peek of the real me. But not too many people.
I have seen a few different ways that people have assessed the past year. Some of the more well know bloggers have played the '4 in 2005' game (e.g.'4 movies I saw in 2005'). Some friends of mine sent out a Christmas letter that used each of the letters of the alphabet to describe their year (wonderful idea and wonderful letter). I ran across a Live Journal entry that listed a number of questions and answers to the questions for their assessment of 2005 (e.g. What was your most embarrassing moment in 2005?). I could see myself doing the alphabet letter, but the other two are just too personal. Not sure I am ready to let you all that far into my head. So, let me see if I can find the right balance between talking about me and opening up that curtain too much..
2005 has been an interesting year for me. Damn .... this is tough. Part of me wants to write as I do with my private journal or with my morning pages, but no one reads those except for me. How about I just write and just let the thoughts fall on to the screen and let the words fall as they will. I feel that life has a number of aspects to it, each of which must be fulfilling to have a complete and satisfying life. There is the work side of things (need to do that in order to pay the bills). There is the health/active side of life (my running). There is the spiritual/personal growth side (my reading of the Dan Millman books, exploration of the dream world). There is the relationship side (friends, family, lovers). There is the creative side (my photography, my writing). There is also the maintenance side of life (housework, yard work, etc.). My goal in life to balance the energy I give to each of those aspects. I understand that each of them will require more energy at a given instant of time which takes energy from other aspects. But over the long run, I hope to give each of them what is required so that I feel I am balanced.
It's been a good year for work. I am fortunate in that I love what I do. If I didn't get paid for software development, I would probably do some of it on my own. I just like to solve problems (even though I think that sometimes the problems that are solved are more associated with the program and hardware on with the software runs than with reality (remember ... it is only ones and zeros)). In 2005 I have taken on additional responsibility and with that additional responsibility comes the opportunity for me to have some input on the direction of the product on which I work. I find that very cool.
I have continued to explore different spiritual/personal growth areas. The one I am most excited about is the dream world. I attended a 2 session dreams workshop during which we worked some dreams during the second session. We each brought in a dream and then worked with each other to try to gain some understanding of what the dream might mean. I thought it was very cool. What is exciting about this is that in a couple of weeks I am going to be part of a new dream group in the area. The purpose of the group is the same as the second session of the dreams workshop; help each other to try to understand what our dreams might mean. The group will be based on the techniques of Jeremy Taylor who believes that each of us is the only one who can truely understand what our dream means. What others can do is to help us to find that understanding, to provide some insight that might trigger an understanding from within us.. This is something that I have wanted to do for a few years. It is very exciting to see it finally happening. Another class I attended that provided me a way to learn more about myself was class on archetypes, based on the work of Caroline Myss. It was a 3 session class where we looked at archetypes, tried to identify the archetypes that apply to each of us, and learned some exercises that can be used with archetypes to explore ourselves. I haven't done much of anything with this, but I want to do more.
I have continued with my running, although not as much I have in the past few years. It's is tough to make the time that is required to run as much as I want. I can easily come up with excuses on why I haven't done the long runs on the weekends like I used to, but that is all they are. Excuses. I've signed up for a 50K in 2 weeks and a couple of 50Ks in March, so I will have to make the time for running. Maybe not the 25 mile runs on the weekends like I used to do, but at least double digit runs during the week and then on the weekend (hmmm, I guess by making this public I will have to follow through ...). If I want to finish the races and feel close to being human, I need to do that. I have to do that. I have also continued with my yoga, although I don't seem to be able to make the time to do it on my own (my own 'practice'). I seem to have to go to a class to get myself to do it. Maybe that is something I can set as a goal for next year.
This entry is getting away from me. I don't know if anyone else finds this interesting. I guess that is one of the nice things about me writing this (instead of chewing on your ear with it). You don't have to read. You can head off to a more interesting blog. One last thing before I end this and get ready to head off to my friends. I am not one to make resolutions for the new year. It just sets me up to fail and gives me another thing about which I can feel guilty. So instead I set goals. Starting doing some yoga at home. Up my running mileage. Stay on top of customer problems at work. Organize the clutter in the garage (something that has been a goal for the past few years). The primay thing I want to do is to continue to make progress on what I said earlier: finding how I can put the right balance of energy into each of the different aspects of my life so that I can feel good about my life as a whole. As long as I am making progress towards that goal, I am doing the right thing. I can feel good about me (even as I beat me up in my morning pages).
So, I hope you have had a wonderful 2005 and that in 2006 you will find yourself on the path to your dreams, whatever they may be.
Have a great 2006!
Since it is the end of the year, I feel an urge to assess the past year and look ahead to 2006. I'm not sure I want to assess 2005 in public here (yea, I know. This is not too public, but still more so than I want). I tend to not let people peek to far behind the facade I put up. Over the past few years, I have let some close friends around back and have given them a peek of the real me. But not too many people.
I have seen a few different ways that people have assessed the past year. Some of the more well know bloggers have played the '4
2005 has been an interesting year for me. Damn .... this is tough. Part of me wants to write as I do with my private journal or with my morning pages, but no one reads those except for me. How about I just write and just let the thoughts fall on to the screen and let the words fall as they will. I feel that life has a number of aspects to it, each of which must be fulfilling to have a complete and satisfying life. There is the work side of things (need to do that in order to pay the bills). There is the health/active side of life (my running). There is the spiritual/personal growth side (my reading of the Dan Millman books, exploration of the dream world). There is the relationship side (friends, family, lovers). There is the creative side (my photography, my writing). There is also the maintenance side of life (housework, yard work, etc.). My goal in life to balance the energy I give to each of those aspects. I understand that each of them will require more energy at a given instant of time which takes energy from other aspects. But over the long run, I hope to give each of them what is required so that I feel I am balanced.
It's been a good year for work. I am fortunate in that I love what I do. If I didn't get paid for software development, I would probably do some of it on my own. I just like to solve problems (even though I think that sometimes the problems that are solved are more associated with the program and hardware on with the software runs than with reality (remember ... it is only ones and zeros)). In 2005 I have taken on additional responsibility and with that additional responsibility comes the opportunity for me to have some input on the direction of the product on which I work. I find that very cool.
I have continued to explore different spiritual/personal growth areas. The one I am most excited about is the dream world. I attended a 2 session dreams workshop during which we worked some dreams during the second session. We each brought in a dream and then worked with each other to try to gain some understanding of what the dream might mean. I thought it was very cool. What is exciting about this is that in a couple of weeks I am going to be part of a new dream group in the area. The purpose of the group is the same as the second session of the dreams workshop; help each other to try to understand what our dreams might mean. The group will be based on the techniques of Jeremy Taylor who believes that each of us is the only one who can truely understand what our dream means. What others can do is to help us to find that understanding, to provide some insight that might trigger an understanding from within us.. This is something that I have wanted to do for a few years. It is very exciting to see it finally happening. Another class I attended that provided me a way to learn more about myself was class on archetypes, based on the work of Caroline Myss. It was a 3 session class where we looked at archetypes, tried to identify the archetypes that apply to each of us, and learned some exercises that can be used with archetypes to explore ourselves. I haven't done much of anything with this, but I want to do more.
I have continued with my running, although not as much I have in the past few years. It's is tough to make the time that is required to run as much as I want. I can easily come up with excuses on why I haven't done the long runs on the weekends like I used to, but that is all they are. Excuses. I've signed up for a 50K in 2 weeks and a couple of 50Ks in March, so I will have to make the time for running. Maybe not the 25 mile runs on the weekends like I used to do, but at least double digit runs during the week and then on the weekend (hmmm, I guess by making this public I will have to follow through ...). If I want to finish the races and feel close to being human, I need to do that. I have to do that. I have also continued with my yoga, although I don't seem to be able to make the time to do it on my own (my own 'practice'). I seem to have to go to a class to get myself to do it. Maybe that is something I can set as a goal for next year.
This entry is getting away from me. I don't know if anyone else finds this interesting. I guess that is one of the nice things about me writing this (instead of chewing on your ear with it). You don't have to read. You can head off to a more interesting blog. One last thing before I end this and get ready to head off to my friends. I am not one to make resolutions for the new year. It just sets me up to fail and gives me another thing about which I can feel guilty. So instead I set goals. Starting doing some yoga at home. Up my running mileage. Stay on top of customer problems at work. Organize the clutter in the garage (something that has been a goal for the past few years). The primay thing I want to do is to continue to make progress on what I said earlier: finding how I can put the right balance of energy into each of the different aspects of my life so that I can feel good about my life as a whole. As long as I am making progress towards that goal, I am doing the right thing. I can feel good about me (even as I beat me up in my morning pages).
So, I hope you have had a wonderful 2005 and that in 2006 you will find yourself on the path to your dreams, whatever they may be.
Have a great 2006!
posted by gym at 4:57 PM
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